<![CDATA[Balm From Gilead

<![CDATA[Balm From Gilead - Blog]]>Mon, 06 May 2024 17:23:34 -0400Weebly<![CDATA[A Classmate's Death]]>Thu, 02 Jun 2022 20:05:47 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/a-classmates-death

Trigger Warning: Suicide

One of my usual morning routines is to check my emails and social media accounts. This morning, I was shocked to discover that one of my classmates died of suicide. He's the second one in my class to die this way. We went through 13 years of Christian schooling together from kindergarten to high school. He was quiet and fit the idiom, "still waters run deep." Although we weren't close, he left an impression on me.

In Bible class of our senior year, we were going over the prophetic books of the Bible. One day in the hallway, my classmate and I had a discussion about it. He told me he had done his own research on prophesy, way beyond what the class entailed, and shared his thoughts on it. I was surprised and impressed with his critical thinking skills on such a complex subject. He clearly was quite intelligent. It left me speechless and in awe of his amazing mind. That pivotal memory is what I remember the most about him.

Our society doesn’t talk much about men experiencing mental health issues. Yet they do. In fact, according to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, here are some starting facts (1):

Suicide is highest among middle-age white men
Men died by suicide almost 4x more than women in 2020
Almost 70% of suicidal deaths in 2020 were by white males
In 2020, nearly 53% of suicidal deaths were by firearms

While society or culture may say "it's not cool" or "manly" to be sensitive, we need to normalize that it's okay for both genders to express their emotions. I firmly believe that men should have their own men's only support groups where they feel safe to open up, discuss real issues, and freely express their emotions. In safe groups, we can find support and healing.

Having experienced suicidal thoughts and attempted suicide twice myself, I can only imagine what my classmate was thinking and feeling in the last few days leading up to his death. My heart and prayers go out to his family and friends. I'm looking forward to the day when Jesus will take away all our pain and suffering.

If you are having suicidal thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. Available 24/7.

If you're unable to talk or feel more comfortable texting, reach out to the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741. Available 24/7.

YOU MATTER!!!

Reference:

American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. (2022). Retrieved on 06-02-2022 from https://afsp.org/suicide-statistics/

#Suicide #SuicidalThoughts #MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #ChristianMentalHealth #HealingBalm #MentalBalm #BalmFromGilead #JourneyToWholeness

]]><![CDATA[Unmasking Asian American Mental Health]]>Mon, 30 May 2022 17:09:45 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/unmasking-asian-american-mental-health

Since May is Mental Health Awareness month and AAPI (Asian American Pacific Islander) Heritage month, we will combine the two and talk about Asian American mental health.

Statistics
Let’s look at some mental health statistics within the Asian American community.

Approximately 24 million people identify as Asian American or Pacific Islander (1)
Nearly 3 million AAPI reported having a mental illness in 2019 (2)
Of those, a little over 23% of AAPI adults with mental illness received treatment (3)
Compared to whites, Asian Americans are three times LESS likely to seek help for mental health issues (4)
For 15-24-year-old Asian Americans, suicide is the leading cause of death (5)
Nearly 78% of southeast Asian American teens witnessed physical aggression and/or community violence, while almost 44% of them have been victims during their lifetime (6)

While the last statistic only talks about southeast Asian Americans, it would likely be the same for all Asian Americans, if not more. In other words, more likely than not, an Asian American has grown up seeing or experiencing some form of abuse. Why is this the case? What are some issues that are creating mental health issues?

Internal Reasons
Many internal reasons, or things that happen within the home, affect one’s mental health within the Asian American community. We’ll look at three of them: shame, generational curse, and parentification.

Asians shame their family members for everything from academic performance to physical appearance to marital duties. The phrase “what will people say” or “what will people think” is used frequently when one steps outside the acceptable norms of the Asian culture. They are shamed into silence or fear. Shame removes one’s freedom to think, speak, and be authentic. It’s a tactic to control and manipulate someone. In other words, the Asian community uses shame in an abusive way.

A generational curse or generational trauma is another internal cause of mental health issues within the Asian community. Exodus 34:7 talks about how a parent's traits are passed down to the third and fourth generations. Science has proven how mental health traits and disorders can be genetically inherited. In the Asian community, abusive traits have been passed down for generations. Abuse has been normalized in this community. But it does not mean it is right. God never said it was okay to abuse someone under any circumstance, even if it’s cultural. To break this generation curse, one needs to see a trauma-informed therapist who is either an Asian American or well-versed in that culture. Support groups or group therapy can also be helpful. One can unlearn these abusive tendencies with time, persistence, and hard work.

Parentification occurs when a child must act as the parent to their siblings and/or parent. In the Asian culture, it is expected that the oldest child(ren) will take care of the younger siblings as if they are the third parent. It is normalized as being acceptable. Comments such as “that’s what we do in our culture," “that's what we did when we were growing up," or "who's going to take care of your brother/sister" are excuses parents use to shame their oldest child(ren) into the parental role. This is quite damaging to a child as they are being forced to become adults before they should be. They lose their childhood as they take on adult responsibilities. This is considered emotional abuse and parental neglect. It certainly is not what God intended when He instructed parents to train their children (Proverbs 22:6).

External Reasons
They are also many external reasons, or things that happen outside the home, that affect one's mental health within the Asian American community. Let's look at three of them: bullying, assimilation, and the "model minority." As a new immigrant, bullying happens quite frequently. One can be bullied for various things, such as being from a different culture, eating different food, having a foreign accent, wearing non-American clothing, etc. It can be especially difficult for immigrant children when their American peers bully them at school. The jeering can be overwhelmingly difficult to deal with, which might lead to anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts. To survive in their new environment, immigrants quickly learn to assimilate so their peers can accept them. They learn how to adapt to the American culture by watching American TV and listening to American radio stations. They even go so far as to learn how to speak and act "white" around their white counterparts and "black" around their black counterparts. Lastly, the "model minority" is a racial stereotype where the public views the Asian community as well-behaved and submissive. It makes it difficult for Asians to be assertive about basic things that another race would be able to do without experiencing backlash.

Barriers
There are many barriers within the Asian community from seeking mental health resources. We'll discuss three of them: stigma, shame, and limited mental health resources for Asians. Mental health is still a considerable stigma within the Asian culture, especially amongst older generations or recent immigrants. The culture also uses shame to keep someone from seeking mental health services. Stereotypical thinking of "only crazy people need help" or "there's nothing wrong with me" discourages the Asian community from seeking help.

Additionally, Asians are concerned with how others perceive them, especially in their own community. Protecting one's reputation is vitally important, and some will go to great lengths to protect it, even denying there's a problem. However, some overcome the stigma and shame and seek therapy anyway, sometimes secretly. For many years in America, there were limited to no Asian American therapists or therapists who truly understood the issues impacting the Asian diaspora. So, Asians spent most of therapy explaining their cultural norms than receiving culturally sensitive psychotherapy. This usually led to frustration, discouragement, and a lack of truly being understood. As a result, some eventually stopped going to therapy. However, the tide changed with the pandemic, which brought increased awareness and organization to Asian American mental health resources. Now time can be spent in culturally sensitive psychotherapy than explaining one's cultural norms. But more Asian American therapists are needed, especially in less Asian populated towns and states.

So what about those who won't see a therapist? They usually talk to their close friends and family about it. Asians have been shamed into being silent to prevent them from sharing troubling things happening at home. It's considered shameful to "air one's dirty laundry" outside the home. So it's discussed internally, which might be unsafe in an abusive situation. The Asian community has learned from childhood to put on a mask when they leave home, pretending everything is fine when it's not. This is why most people probably won’t know an Asian American is struggling with mental health issues until they verbalize it or it's gotten to a point where the individual and/or family can’t hide it anymore.

How to Create a Safe Space
How do you respond to someone who has trusted you and opened up to you about their mental health concerns? How can you ensure you're creating a safe space for them? I will share with you some tools that I use as a health coach to create a safe space for my clients. When I first learned about health coaching, I immediately saw how these principles were Christlike as they taught HOW to be like Him.

First of all, be supportive. Most people want support, not unsolicited advice. Asian Americans tend to get quite a bit of unsolicited advice from their family and culture. It's rare that someone will be supportive without having their own agenda. What does being supportive look like?

Meet them where they are. Think of the woman at the well (John 4:4–42). Christ met a Samaritan woman during the hottest part of the day. This is meeting her where she was. He didn't tell her to go over to a shaded tree so He could have a discussion with her. He met her on her turf to show her His humbleness and compassion.
Create a safe space by being non-judgmental and compassionate. Christ already knew that the woman at the well had multiple partners in the past, was currently unmarried, and now living with a man. Yet Christ did not condemn or judge her. He, of all people, could have. But He chose to be non-judgmental and show her compassion (7, 8).

Secondly, reflectively listen to them. This is a term used in health coaching. It has two parts to it. First of all, actively listen to them without figuring out how to respond to them. Listen just to listen without any agenda. Refrain from interrupting as this might communicate disrespect, frustrate them, and make them feel unheard. After they finish talking, wait about 5 seconds before responding. Sometimes, they might experience an "ah-ha" moment in this moment of pausing. So this pause can be therapeutic. The second part of reflective listening is making a reflective statement. A reflective statement mirrors what the other person said. It's like holding up a mirror to the other person. Many times people just need to hear themselves talk to figure out the answer for themselves because they are the expert in their lives. Reflective statements help with this process. An example of a reflective statement is…"you feel more comfortable at your friend's house than at home" (7, 8).

Thirdly, ask open-ended questions, which are questions that cannot be answered with one word or phrase. Usually, open-ended questions start with how, what, tell me, and sometimes why. Many times when questions begin with why it can sound judgmental. So be careful in how you use the word why. Another way to ask why is by asking for their reasons, such as "what are some reasons you want to change" (7, 8). Some other examples of open-ended questions are:

"How are you feeling today?"
"What does being in a safe environment look like to you?"
"Tell me a time when you felt safe."

Whenever you respond, rotate between making a reflective statement and asking an open-ended question at a ratio of 1:1. Many times, we have a tendency to ask multiple questions in a row, which can make a person feel like they are being interrogated and not supported (7, 8).

Another way to make reflective statements is to acknowledge, validate, and affirm them. Acknowledge their situation. Validate their feelings. Affirm their strengths. These types of reflections will do wonders in building rapport, feeling heard, and creating a safe space (7, 8).

Lastly, you may find yourself in a situation where it would be beneficial to give advice. Check-in with yourself first to ensure you're not advising to glorify yourself or because you know what's best for them. Once that's squared away, ask their permission first before giving advice. Here's how to do it. Ask them what they know about the topic you want to advise. After they finish, ask them if it would be okay to share additional information on the topic. WAIT for their response. If they say no, respect their boundary to keep rapport intact. If they say yes, give them a small bite-size chunk of the information to prevent information overload. Then ask them what they thought about it (7, 8). Here's how it would go.

You: What do you know about (specific topic)?
Friend: (Responds to question)
You: Can I share some additional info about (specific topic)?
Friend: (If yes, continue with the next step; if no, stop)
You: (Share bite-size info.) What do you think about that info?
Friend: (Responds to question)

These are just some things you can do to create a safe space. There are many more tools we use in health coaching. Hopefully, this will help you to get started. Consider practicing it with your loved ones so it can flow easily when a friend in need comes to you for help. What's one thing you're taking away from this blog post? I'd love to hear it.

Asian American Mental Health Resources
Here are some Asian American Mental Health Resources, which can also be found on our Resources page.

Asians For Mental Health https://asiansformentalhealth.com/
Asian Mental Health Collective https://www.asianmhc.org/
Mango Tree Counseling & Consulting http://mangotreecc.com/
National Asian American Pacific Islander Mental Health Association https://www.naapimha.org/
Orchid https://orchid.exchange/
South Asian Therapists https://southasiantherapists.org/

References

https://www.commerce.gov/news/blog/2022/05/us-census-bureau-releases-key-stats-honor-asian-american-native-hawaiian-and
https://www.mhanational.org/issues/asian-americanpacific-islander-communities-and-mental-health
https://www.nami.org/Your-Journey/Identity-and-Cultural-Dimensions/Asian-American-and-Pacific-Islander
https://adaa.org/find-help/by-demographics/asian-pacific-islanders
https://www.psychiatry.org/File%20Library/Psychiatrists/Cultural-Competency/Mental-Health-Disparities/Mental-Health-Facts-for-Asian-Americans-Pacific-Islanders.pdf
https://aapaonline.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/AAPA_Trauma-Violence-web1.pdf
Miller, W. R., & Rollnick, S. (2013). Motivational interviewing (3rd ed.). Guilford Press.
Moore, M., Jackson, E., & Tschannen-Moran, B. (2016). Coaching psychology manual (2nd ed.). Wolters Kluwer.

]]><![CDATA[Spiritual Abuse]]>Tue, 25 Jan 2022 18:33:49 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/spiritual-abuse

This month is Spiritual Abuse awareness month.

Spiritual abuse is someone who uses faith, religion, or sacred writings in a manipulative way to instill fear in the victim in order to exert power and control over them. The spiritual bully may use shame, emotions, criticism, humiliation, or judgment to manipulate or coerce the victim's behavior. The victim may feel inferior, ashamed, threatened, degraded, cornered, etc.

Some examples of spiritual abuse are…
1. You didn't pray hard enough or long enough.
2. You're holding onto a cherished sin so God can't hear your prayers.
3. You're not holy enough; you need to do X in order for God to hear you.
4. A godly person would not dress that way or would not wear X.
5. You must fix all these things before you can be accepted into our church.
6. A good Christian must repent/forgive them now.
7. A good Christian must accept their forgiveness now.
8. You must pray with me right now.
9. If you really loved/respected God, then you would do X for Him.
10. Inviting a romantic interest to Bible study under false pretenses.
11. God told me you're supposed to be my spouse.
12. The Bible says the wife must submit to her husband.

What are some other examples of spiritual abuse that you can think of? Comment below.

#SpiritualAbuse
#SpiritualAbuseAwareness
#JourneyToWholeness
#BalmFromGilead
#HealingBalm
#SpiritualBalm
#MentalBalm
#MentalHealth
#MentalHealthAwareness
#AsianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianMentalHealth
#AsianChristians
#SouthAsianChristians
#AsianChristianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianChristianMentalHealth

]]><![CDATA[Childhood Trauma Increases Likelihood of Poor Health in Adulthood]]>Tue, 14 Dec 2021 12:00:00 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/childhood-trauma-increases-likelihood-of-poor-health-in-adulthood

Did you know if you experienced or saw violence, abuse, or trauma as a child, it can…

Change how your brain develops?
Affect how you respond to stress?
Increase your likelihood of acquiring chronic physical health problems, mental health problems, and substance misuse as an adult?

This is what the ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) Study found. It looked at abuse, neglect, and non-traumatic events, like a parents' divorce, that happened during childhood.

The higher your ACEs score, the higher your risk for physical health problems, mental health problems, and substance misuse in adulthood.

About 1 in 6 American adults have reported an ACEs score of 4 or more.

Check out these shocking statistics for anyone with an ACEs score of 4 or more.

They are likely to increase their risk of…

Chronic pulmonary lung disease by 390 percent;
Hepatitis by 240 percent;
Depression by 460 percent;
Attempted suicide by 1,220 percent

Additionally, they are:

1.8 times likely to smoke cigarettes
1.9 times likely to become obese
2.4 times likely to experience ongoing anxiety
2.5 times likely to experience panic reactions
3.6 times likely to be depressed or to qualify as promiscuous
6.6 times likely to engage in early-life sexual intercourse
7.2 times likely to become alcoholic
11.1 times likely to become IV drug users

There is hope. Even with these startling statistics, God gives us a way to overcome the worst odds. It starts with finding a trauma informed licensed therapist. Additionally, there are other things you can do: attend support groups, surround yourself with healthy people, use healthy coping skills, pray, read the Bible, educate yourself, practice self-care, etc.

To find out your ACEs score, go to: http://traumadissociation.com/ace. It's also on our Resources page.

References

]]><![CDATA[Toxicity in Heaven]]>Tue, 23 Nov 2021 12:00:00 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/toxicity-in-heaven

Lucifer changed of his own free will. He became toxic. I can only imagine how much God tried to help Lucifer to see the error of his ways. But there was no way to reach him. Cognitive distortions became fixated in Lucifer's mind. It had gone to the point where he would not repent. Not to mention, he was spreading his toxicity by convincing other angels that God was the bad guy (gaslighting). War erupted in heaven. Whether it was a physical, verbal, emotional, or mental warfare or a combination thereof, the peaceful happy home of heaven was destroyed during this time period.

Order and tranquility needed to be restored to the heavenly home. God put His foot down. Enough was enough. Since Lucifer and his "flying monkeys" refused to repent, He kicked them out of heaven. Such toxicity would not be allowed to exist in His heavenly sanctuary. However, the fallout of this pivotal moment caused a ripple effect, even affecting those innocent creatures not yet created. It grieved God to see innocent beings affected by all this.

God shows us repeatedly throughout the Bible that it is okay to set boundaries. In fact, He encourages us to implement boundaries to keep us safe. Anyone who tells you otherwise, does not understand that a loving God has appropriate and healthy boundaries. As human beings, we are created in God's image. So let us follow His example and bravely set firm boundaries.

See Isaiah 14:12-14; Ezekiel 28:11-19; Luke 10:18; Revelation 12:7-9

Share this #HealingBalm with others.

#Toxic
#Toxicity
#Gaslighting
#FlyingMonkeys
#Boundaries
#JourneyToWholeness
#BalmFromGilead
#MentalBalm
#MentalHealth
#MentalHealthAwareness
#AsianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianMentalHealth
#ChristianMentalHealth
#AsianChristians
#SouthAsianChristians
#AsianChristianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianChristianMentalHealth

]]><![CDATA[Hesitation]]>Tue, 16 Nov 2021 18:23:26 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/hesitation

I was talking recently with a fellow mental health advocate about hesitation. She mentioned a situation where she hesitated before giving an answer. She later discovered her hesitation was a nonverbal indicator to her body saying no.

Sometimes when people ask us to do something, we may hesitate before giving an answer. Pay attention to that hesitation. Your body is trying to tell you something that your brain may not have processed yet.

Your body knows you can't take on one more church project.
Your body knows you're overwhelmed with work responsibilities.
Your body knows you can't go to another dinner with an abusive family member.
Your body knows you need distance from a toxic person or situation.
Your body knows you are tired and need rest.

Pay attention when you hesitate, and search deeply to find out what that momentary hesitation means to you.

#Hesitation
#TheBodyKnows
#TheBodyKeepsTheScore
#JourneyToWholeness
#BalmFromGilead
#HealingBalm
#MentalBalm
#MentalHealth
#MentalHealthAwareness
#ChristianMentalHealth
#AsianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianMentalHealth
#AsianChristians
#SouthAsianChristians
#AsianChristianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianChristianMentalHealth

]]><![CDATA[When to Call 911]]>Wed, 29 Sep 2021 15:00:00 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/when-to-call-911

Trigger Warning: Suicide
💚
People are quick to call 911 when someone is having a medical emergency. However, they are hesitant when someone is actively suicidal. Let’s normalize calling 911 or taking them to the nearest ER when someone is actively suicidal.

💚
Having worked as a psych nurse and volunteered as a Crisis Counselor, there are 4 things we look for to see if a person needs to go to the ER now. These are:
✔️ Suicidal Ideation: They are expressing thoughts or feelings of hopelessness, death, dying, etc.
✔️ Plan: They have a plan to kill themselves.
✔️ Means: They have access to the item they intend to use.
✔️ Timeframe: They have a date and/or time of when they plan to do it, especially if it's within 48 hours.

When all 4 are present, emergency services MUST be called. No exceptions.
💚
Even if all these items are not present, when someone expresses suicide, it's important to be there with them. Grab some friends and take turns checking in with them.
✔️ Check in with them frequently, perhaps even multiple times a day.
✔️ Be willing to listen to them, even just sitting with them with your arms around them in silence.
✔️ Get them out of the house and do something, like taking a walk.
✔️ Encourage them to see a licensed therapist and/or attend group therapy.

Being there in a non-judgmental way will go a long way to showing your loved one that you care about them.
💚
Together we can prevent suicide.
💚
If you’re in a crisis, contact one of the hotlines below:
U.S. Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
U.S. Crisis Text Line: Text SHARE to 741-741
International: FindAHelpline.com
💚
Not sure what to say to someone who's suicidal? Check out the @realdepressionproject for tips.
💚
Also, check out our Resources page for hotlines, warm lines, therapists, etc.
💚
💚
💚
Follow @BalmFromGilead for more #MentalHealth related content.
💚
#SuicidePrevention
#SuicidalIdeation
#Advocate
#JourneyToWholeness
#BalmFromGilead
#HealingBalm
#MentalBalm
#MentalHealthAwareness
#AsianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianMentalHealth
#AsianChristians
#SouthAsianChristians
#AsianChristianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianChristianMentalHealth

]]><![CDATA[Cry for Help]]>Wed, 22 Sep 2021 11:00:00 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/cry-for-help

Trigger Warning: Suicide, Suicidal Ideation, Depression
💚
💚
💚
On one particular Sunday, in the 1990s, a classmate called me and said she was holding a knife and was going to kill herself. Even though I was only a freshman in high school, I knew she was crying out for help.

💚
Prior to this phone call, during school, she expressed to a group of us how frustrated she was and how she was done with life. I immediately verbalized my concern for her. But her friends were dismissive and said, oh she always says that, it doesn't mean anything. Her friends minimized the situation. I was still worried and knew her comments were serious. Outside of her friends' earshot, I told her I was there for her. Some time had passed from this incident to that Sunday.
💚
What she said on that Sunday, I took seriously. My heart raced with thoughts of what to do to help her. God reminded me of what I had already learned to do in situations like this. I asked her to promise me that she would not do anything until I called her back. She promised. I hung up the phone and immediately called our high school counselor. He quickly gave me some instructions of how to keep my classmate calm and safe while he got her help. I called her back. She picked up the phone. She didn't attempt to do anything. Thank God, I said to myself. We talked for some time when she told me there was a knock at the door. Her extended family had come to help her after they got the call from our counselor. I knew it was safe to hang up the phone.
💚
Some time had passed when the second incident occurred.
💚
Back then, before cell phones, we would pass notes to each other. One afternoon, I found a note in my locker from her, which said not to open it until I got home. I immediately became suspicious. As I walked into my last class, which was study hall, I sat down with some of our mutual friends. They all said they too got a note from her, saying not to open it until they got home. In the pit of my stomach, I knew something was wrong. I told them all to open their notes right then. Some of them protested as they didn't want to dishonor her request. Time was ticking by as I tried to reason with them. Eventually they relented at my persistent demands. Each note expressed appreciation for the relationship and gifted the recipient with one of her treasures. Essentially, it was a good-bye note with her giving away her valuable possessions. The suicidal warning signs were there. I knew she was planning to commit suicide again.
💚
I had to act fast. The last bell was going to ring. I had to stop her from going home. Unfortunately, we were stuck with the strictest, most uncompassionate teacher for study hall that day. Only one person could leave study hall at a time to use the bathroom, and there was already a long line of people waiting. I explained the emergent situation with the teacher, and she still refused to let me go see the counselor. It wasn't a surprise but it was still frustrating and disappointing.
💚
So we devised a plan. A couple of my friends distracted the teacher while I made a run for it. I could see the angry look of betrayal on her face as I ran to the counselor's office. I explained to him what was going on. He immediately took off in the direction of my friend's classroom, passing the large window to the study hall on our way. The study hall teacher's expression changed from anger to surprise when she saw the counselor scurrying down the hallway with me not far behind. I showed the counselor which classroom she was in. Then I went back to study hall.
💚
The bell rang just then as I walked back into study hall. I was relieved the counselor got to her before the last bell rang. She was safe. My friends and I watched as our friend was accompanied by the counselor down the hallway to his office. Our eyes met as she walked by that large window. She gave me a look as she realized it was me who had called the counselor after reading her good-bye note.
💚
I checked in with her later to see if she was upset with me. She wasn't. Things changed for her as she finally received the help and attention she needed.
💚
September is #NationalSuicidePreventionMonth. I'm sharing this pivotal time in my high school experience to show you that you can make a difference at any age and with limited knowledge. Up to that point, I only knew a few things about suicide. But the only thing that really mattered is that I believed her and I cared. When you step out in faith to help someone, God will be there to give you the words to say and the next steps to take. Feel free to reach out and contact me. Together, we can prevent suicide.
💚
If you’re in a crisis, contact one of the hotlines below:
U.S. Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
U.S. Crisis Text Line: Text SHARE to 741-741
International: FindAHelpline.com
💚
Not sure what to say to someone who's suicidal? Check out the @realdepressionproject for tips.
💚
Also, check out our Resources page for hotlines, warm lines, therapists, etc.
💚
💚
💚
Share, Comment, Like, and Follow @BalmFromGilead for more #MentalHealth related content.
💚
#TrueStory
#SuicidePrevention
#SuicidalIdeation
#Advocate
#JourneyToWholeness
#BalmFromGilead
#HealingBalm
#MentalBalm
#MentalHealthAwareness
#AsianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianMentalHealth
#AsianChristians
#SouthAsianChristians
#AsianChristianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianChristianMentalHealth

]]><![CDATA[Suicidal Thoughts Plagued Me]]>Thu, 16 Sep 2021 11:00:00 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/suicidal-thoughts-plagued-me

Trigger Warning: Suicide, Suicidal Ideation
💚
I was 22 when suicidal thoughts again plagued my mind. I didn’t want to live anymore. The emotional rollercoaster was too much. I felt hysterical and inconsolable. I just wanted the nightmare to end. Darkness was closing in fast…and it seemed there was no light at the end of the tunnel.

💚
I called the only person I knew who would help me…my high school counselor. I frantically dialed his number. I don't recall what I said, but he knew I was in crisis and needed to get to the hospital ASAP. He reassured me he was going to call the dean at my dorm immediately, and then call me right back. As I waited, feeling empty and shattered, I looked around the room, not sure when I had torn it apart.
💚
I don’t remember all the details of that night. But one thing I clearly remember is how the dean didn’t believe I was suicidal nor that I needed to go to the hospital. She was dragging her feet in getting me the help I needed. If it wasn't for my #counselor persistently and continuously #advocating for me, I'm not sure I would be alive today. He made me feel cared for, valued, safe, and important. I knew he would make sure that I got the help I needed.
💚
Who can you count on when life is overwhelmingly unmanageable?
💚
September is #NationalSuicidePreventionMonth. I'm sharing a snippet of my story to let you know that I've been there. I get it. You’re not alone. Feel free to reach out and connect with me. Together, we can prevent suicide.
💚
If you’re in a crisis, contact one of the hotlines below:
U.S. Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
U.S. Crisis Text Line: Text SHARE to 741-741
International: FindAHelpline.com
💚
Not sure what to say to someone who's suicidal? Check out the @realdepressionproject for tips.
💚
Also, check out our Resources page for hotlines, warm lines, therapists, etc.
💚
💚
💚
Follow @BalmFromGilead on FB and IG for more #MentalHealth related content.
💚
#MeToo
#SuicidePrevention
#Advocate
#JourneyToWholeness
#BalmFromGilead
#HealingBalm
#MentalBalm
#MentalHealthAwareness
#AsianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianMentalHealth
#AsianChristians
#SouthAsianChristians
#AsianChristianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianChristianMentalHealth

]]><![CDATA[Suicide Prevention]]>Fri, 10 Sep 2021 14:18:25 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/suicide-prevention

Reach out to someone you haven't talked to in awhile. Your contact can make a world of difference to someone who is feeling emotional and thinking of taking their life.

💚
Suicidal thoughts can happen to anyone at any time, regardless of money, power, status, age, race, ethnicity, nationality, culture, religion, gender, sexual orientation, etc.
💚
Not sure what to say to someone who's suicidal? Check out The Depression Project for tips.
💚
If you're feeling suicidal and live in the U.S., call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. Alternatively, you can text the word SHARE to 741-741 to reach a trained crisis counselor at the Crisis Text Line.
💚
If you live outside the U.S, go to this website: https://findahelpline.com/ to locate your country's helpline.
💚
Also, our Resources page has a list of hotlines, warmlines, therapists, support groups, and much more. Check it out. https://balmfromgilead.com/resources.html
💚
Together, we can prevent suicide.
💚
Please SHARE these lifesaving tips. Follow @BalmFromGilead on FB and IG for similar content.
💚
💚
💚
#NationalSuicidePreventionMonth
#NationalSuicidePreventionWeek
#WorldSuicidePreventionDay
#SuicidePrevention
#JourneyToWholeness
#BalmFromGilead
#HealingBalm
#MentalBalm
#MentalHealth
#MentalHealthAwareness
#AsianMentalHealth
#SouthAsianMentalHealth
#AsianChristians
#SouthAsianChristians

]]><![CDATA[Self-Talk]]>Sun, 05 Sep 2021 00:52:16 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/self-talk

Take a moment and think about how you talk to yourself. Is it mostly positive or is it mostly negative? Some of us may speak negatively about ourselves to ourselves, such as I'm not good enough, I can never lose weight, Everyone hates me, etc. Negative self-talk can lead to experiencing negative emotions (feeling helpless, hopeless, depressed, etc.), which then leads to negative behaviors (skipping exercise sessions, eating unhealthy meals, sleeping more, etc.).

Be intentional and start talking positively about yourself to yourself.

Here are some ways to decrease negative self-talk:

Notice when you're talking negatively about yourself, and replace it with a positive, true statement
Write down 3-5 positive affirmations on an index card. Say these affirmations out loud in front of a mirror multiple times throughout your day
Find 3-5 uplifting Bible verses. Rewrite them in the first person. Say them out loud multiple times throughout your day. Example of Jeremiah 1:5: Before God formed me in my mother's womb, He knew me.
Use the @ThinkUpApp to record positive affirmations in your own voice and play them nightly just as you're about to go to sleep

It may take some time to change. So keep at it and be consistent. In a little while, you'll start to notice positive changes in your self-talk.

"Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things." Philippians 4:8

If you were blessed by this post, please like, share, and save this post. Be sure to follow @BalmFromGilead for similar content.

#SelfTalk #MindChatter #VoiceInsideMyHead #JourneyToWholeness #BalmFromGilead #HealingBalm #MentalBalm #MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #AsianMentalHealth #SouthAsianMentalHealth #AsianChristians #SouthAsianChristians

]]><![CDATA[The Power of Journaling]]>Fri, 27 Aug 2021 22:45:00 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/the-power-of-journaling

At 9 years old, I started journaling. As I grew older, I found it therapeutic to write down my highs and lows. Periodically, I would review what I had written. As I re-read those entries, I started to see patterns. I noticed certain people were not a positive influence in my life by their consistent mistreatment of people. Their actions and their patterns spoke volumes.

🔹
In college, I was too busy to keep journaling. Hindsight, I wish I had made time to do it. If I did, I would have recognized inconsistencies and toxic people much sooner. When I didn't journal, I noticed I tended to downplay what really happened, keeping me stuck in an unhealthy relationship much longer than needed.
🔹
I can't say this enough. Journaling is a powerful tool. It is helpful in many, different ways. While most of us may think of journaling as a way to keep track of what's happening in our personal lives, it can also be helpful in other, specific ways.
🔹
For example, let's say you want to lose weight. Keep a weight loss journal. Write down details of your food intake and exercises. Nowadays, this is done through diet tracking apps, like My Fitness Pal. These journals or tracking devices can help you be honest with yourself of your caloric intake and energy expenditure. As you review the raw data, you'll understand what is keeping you from obtaining your goal weight and adjust accordingly. I've done this before, and it does work!
🔹
Another example is to keep a gratitude journal. Every day write down at least one thing you're thankful for. Try not to repeat your gratitude. This will encourage your brain to look for positive things throughout your day. I recently started doing this. In a short time, I noticed a more positive outlook on my life. Give it a try.
🔹
What are some ways you use a journal? Comment below.
🔹
🔹
🔹
Like, share, and follow @BalmFromGilead.
🔹
#Journaling #JourneyToWholeness #BalmOfGilead #BalmFromGilead #BurnOutRecovery #HealingFromBurnOut #HealingBalm #MentalBalm #MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #AsianMentalHealth #SouthAsianMentalHealth #PhysicalBalm #PhysicalHealth #SpiritualBalm #SpiritualHealth #Christians #AsianChristians #SouthAsianChristians

]]><![CDATA[Validation]]>Fri, 20 Aug 2021 22:30:23 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/validation

A key component to healing is validation. When someone confirms you have indeed experienced pain, a sense of relief comes over the body. It helps you feel listened to and cared for.

🔹
Validation is acknowledging a person's thoughts, feelings, experiences, etc. It can be verbal or nonverbal, such as a hug, a look of concern, a kind gesture, etc.
🔹
Invalidation is damaging and can lead to re-traumatization. It can cause feelings of self-doubt (did that really happen to me?), low self-esteem, and low self-worth.
🔹
Sometimes you might hear a mixture of the two, where they say, "yeah that sounds tough but…." Anything after that "but" invalidates what was said before. In essence, it's mixing the good with the bad, which means it's overall bad and invalidates you.
🔹
Let's use a Biblical illustration.
🔹
The Bible speaks of the good, pure dough (validation) being mixed with a little bit of yeast (sin, invalidation). Pretty soon that small amount of yeast has taken over the entire dough, fermenting it. No part of that dough is purely dough anymore. This is how it is when people mix validation with invalidation. (Matthew 16:6, 12; 1 Corinthians 5:6; Galatians 5:9)
🔹
Usually validation comes from safe people, which can be a therapist, a support group member, or caring loved ones.
🔹
Here are some examples of how to validate someone.

I believe you.
That was a wise choice.
You deserve (respect, safety, freedom, etc.)
It makes sense that you're feeling (an emotion) because of (the situation).
You are a (strong, brave, courageous, etc) person for enduring (the situation).

🔹
What are some ways someone has validated you? Comment below.
🔹
🔹
🔹
If you were blessed by this post, comment, like, share, and follow @BalmFromGilead
🔹
#Validation #Invalidation #Christians #AsianChristians #SouthAsianChristians #JourneyToWholeness #BalmOfGilead #BalmFromGilead #BurnOutRecovery #HealingFromBurnOut #HealingBalm #MentalBalm #MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #AsianMentalHealth #SouthAsianMentalHealth #PhysicalBalm #PhysicalHealth #SpiritualBalm #SpiritualHealth

]]><![CDATA[Rejected for Speaking the Truth]]>Sat, 14 Aug 2021 12:48:48 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/rejected-for-speaking-the-truth

Over the last few months, I've been sharing some truths with different groups of people. Many of these truths had to do with oppression, toxic behavior, and abuse, and how God is against such things. (Isaiah 1:17; Psalm 72:4; Psalm 34:18; Matthew 7:15; Proverbs 31:30; 1 Corinthians 5:11)

🔹
Some heeded the warning with thankful hearts while others didn't. Some were down right spiteful and personally attacked me. The ones who didn't see anything wrong with oppression, toxicity, or abuse fought the hardest, the longest, and the loudest. By their comments, it was clear they were toxic themselves. They were blind, and they weren't open to hearing the truth. Their hearts had become cold and hard. (Proverbs 28:14; Matthew 13:14-15; Revelation 3:17)
🔹
Some of them got under my skin. Their responses hurt, especially when they personally attacked me, instead of staying on topic. Nothing would be gained by responding to such nonsense. So I didn't. I gave them the information (planted the seeds), and it was up to God to convict them of it (make the plant grow). Perhaps someone else would come along to present additional, supporting information (water the plant). (1 Corinthians 3:6)
🔹
Throughout the Bible, God's people were mocked, ridiculed, and harmed for telling the truth. Jesus Christ endured similar but harsher treatment and paid the ultimate price. As we draw closer to the 2nd Coming, I believe the number of toxic and abusive people will increase. See 2 Timothy 3:1-5. But as Christians we have the blessed hope that the King of kings will soon come to rescue us from the Evil One and his followers. (Revelation 1:7; Revelation 20:10; Revelation 21)
🔹
In the meantime, surround yourselves with like-minded, kind-hearted, and emotionally safe Christians who will validate you, strengthen you, give you sound advice, uplift you in prayer, and share relevant Scriptures with you. Having a group of safe friends you can trust during the rough patches will make a world of difference. It did for me.
🔹
🔹
🔹
If you were blessed by this post, drop a comment, like, share, and follow us.
🔹
#Truth #Rejection #Oppression #Toxicity #ToxicBehavior #Abuse #Blind #Laodiceans #Laodicea #HardenedTheirHearts #Planting #GodGaveTheIncrease #Apollos #Jesus #2ndComing #Friends #Christians #JourneyToWholeness #BalmOfGilead #BalmFromGilead #BurnOutRecovery #HealingFromBurnOut #HealingBalm #MentalBalm #MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #PhysicalBalm #PhysicalHealth #SpiritualBalm #SpiritualHealth

]]><![CDATA[Are You Ready to Change?]]>Wed, 04 Aug 2021 14:00:00 GMThttp://balmfromgilead.com/blog/are-you-ready-to-change

Whenever we want to make a change in our health journey (from eating healthy to finding a therapist to reading the Bible), we need to evaluate whether we are ready to change. If we are not ready to change, we stay in the same place.

🔹
There are 5 stages of the behavioral change model: precontemplation, contemplation, preparation, action, and maintenance. As you read through the different stages, consider what behavior you are trying to change and where you are in the change process.
🔹
PRECONTEMPLATION
No intention of changing. They may or may not be aware of the risk factors. They may deny the seriousness of the health problem or become defensive when others bring it up. Education and correcting misinformation may help them to move to the next stage.
🔹
CONTEMPLATION
Thinking of changing, possibly in the next 6 months. They are ambivalent about changing. Weighing the pros and cons, correcting misinformation, and finding ways to overcome barriers will help them to move to the next stage.
🔹
PREPARATION
Made a decision to change and are making preparations to change. Setting realistic goals for one's lifestyle and abilities will help them to move to the next stage.
🔹
ACTION
Actively making the desired behavior change into their lives but has not maintained it for 6 months. Will need on-going support to overcome obstacles and to help them to move to the next stage.
🔹
MAINTENANCE
Has incorporated the behavior change into their lives for at least 6 months. May seek a professional to further enhance their behavior change.
🔹
Moving forward (progress) is the goal. However, it's also possible to move backwards, or relapse.
🔹
Are you ready to change? If so, which stage are you in? What is keeping you from moving forward to the next stage?
🔹
🔹
🔹
If you were blessed by this post, then drop a comment, like, share, and follow @BalmFromGilead on Facebook and Instagram.
🔹
#Change #ReadyToChange #StagesOfBehavioralChange #TranstheoreticalModel #JourneyToWholeness #BalmOfGilead #BalmFromGilead #MentalBalm #MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #AsianMentalHealth #SouthAsianMentalHealth #PhysicalBalm #PhysicalHealth #SpiritualBalm #SpiritualHealth

]]>